The Notes of An Unpaid Intern
We all know what the contestants go through but what about the interns? I mean we know they constantly die and no one gives a crap about them. Well today Ben109 writes this piece of crap. As an intern expresses his feelings and the host mocks him for it. Heh heh, feelings. March 17 Dear journal, today is the 17th of March Well today journal it was another rough day on set. The filming of this new show has put so much stress on me. They don’t even pay minimum wage here. Today we had to introduce the stupid contestants. They should have interns like me on the show. They could call it “We’re running Out Of Original Ideas and People Who Actually Want To Join This Stupid Show” or “Total Drama Intern” something like that. Anyway today we did the first part of the challenge. The lighting was terrible so naturally Chris whipped us. Yeah he knows it isn’t legal. Anyway while trying to release the giant rabid beaver I got a splinter. Seeing wood the beaver jumped onto my chest and ate my shirt. This happened to my overweight co worker who got fired for lowering the ratings with his ugliness. Sadly this was only part one of the challenge. The other part was a monstrous Easter egg hunt. Trying to hide the eggs of an angry goose the size of King Kong is torture. I moved to ''Canada'' to experience a better life than just McDonalds and video games. Instead I’m an unpaid intern, unless you count chickens as a currency, dangling from a strand of barbed wire above a shark pool! Then all of us interns were forced to play dramatic music during the elimination ceremony. Sadly one of the contestants went insane and threw a flaming torch at my friend’s head. She shouted something about rabid leprechauns taking over the universe and hopped into the water and never came out. Sad thing is she will probably be one of the ones returning. As the fire died out the interns had to find their way to the Crap Shack. If you thought where the contestants stayed was bad. Wait til you hear about this place. As soon as you walk in your hit with the smell of a dead fish and skunk making love in a sewage treatment plant. Secondly if you have too much weight on the left side the whole shack will fall off a cliff to a slow painful death. If you have a large rainstorm the roof will cave in like an oatmeal crème pie. Also sometimes in the night the contestants voted off first in competitions feed on unsuspecting interns. Well goodnight diary—I mean journal. Yours truly, Unpaid Intern #123,456,789,101,112 Can you believe this guy? I just fired him today and found this in a cracked hole in the Crap Shack. Wow what a pansy! I thought Chef was emotional this dude would cry if someone stepped on a dandelion or if their best friend caught on fire, what a wuss! Well there’s more entries than this I’m gonna enjoy ruining this guys life! Yours truly, Christine Leane Mclean March 18 ''Today is the 18th of March, '' '' '' '' '' '' Today the interns started a thing we call the Elimination Gamble. Basically the interns bet on who will win the challenge and who will be eliminated.. Sadly we don’t get paid in real money; it’s mostly socks and chickens. So while doing this Chris walks in announcing that the challenge for today is an intern hunt. There usually is always a challenge that involves us. However this challenge was all about us. The contestants had to capture the interns and then shoot the captured interns at their competitors. Yeah it’s as bad as it sounds. Also being man-handled by Ugly, overweight, and snobby teens is not very pleasant. The day went by fast. Which was a good thing to cause if I got shot out of a cannon into some gigantic freshman one more time I was gonna snap. Eventually some stereotypical sassy black girl was voted off. I really have no idea why she was on anyway. I guess it was so we wouldn’t be just one big blob of Vanilla. Sorry for today’s chapter being short. '' Wow this guy is still a bore! I mean everything he writes makes me want to sleep! Also who uses gonna now a days what is this 1999? Next he’ll be saying da bomb. Anywho that challenge was amazing. Also how come this idiot capitalized ugly. He’s in college! To be fair he is from. America. Sincerely Racist, Christine Leane Mclean